Thinking about fertility

Let's imagine for a moment that Chloe, Lisa and Tanja are all in a similar situation with their fertility troubles. They have all been trying for 3 years and they have all had 1 miscarriage. However, despite this, they all feel completely differently.

Chloe is feeling angry.

Tanja is feeling calm.

Lisa is feeling sad.

Why do they all feel differently?

The main reason is that they have completely different thoughts about their situation:

  • Chloe is angry that she is the only one in her family that seems to be having this problem. She tells herself that she should have conceived ages ago, and this situation in not fair.
  • Tanja is thinking: "I cannot control conception; therefore nothing is to be gained from being upset about it. All I can do is to continue to try and move on with other things in my life."
  • Lisa is thinking about how empty her life is, and how if she never conceives the rest of her life is going to be meaningless.

Can you see how thoughts like these can lead to these different emotional states?